just another critter, frittering away in time.: Archive

Dec 31st

serious question

how do you pee with a garter belt

Dec 31st

Tonight I’m going to a new year’s potluck party and apparently we’re supposed to dress very, very fancy. As much as I’d love to make use of all the dresses and heels I own solely for photoshoots, I’m really tempted to go dressed as a boy and make everyone feel bad because I have better clothes than they do. Then again this is why people at parties learn to hate me,...

Dec 31st

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OMG IT’S SNOWING GUYS LOOK OMG SNOW All I want is to hotbox an igloo. Please stick. Thank you.

Dec 29th

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(conversations with my mother always end the same)

mom: Susan, you have such nice long arms and legs and a slender body, you would be very good at ballet.
me: I don't think that matters actually. Ballet is about grace and poise - two things I do not have. There are fat people who are more coordinated than I am. I'm more of a twig that doesn't bend.. or move.
mom: YES YOU NEVER MOVE WHY CAN'T YOU MOVE FOR 5 MINUTES AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM ALSDKFJWLEASHDFLWKEJFASDLFHWUK
me: [umexcusemebutweren'twejusttalkingabouthowhotmybodyis]

Dec 29th

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“In this course you will learn how humans develop from the prenatal period up until puberty. Emphasis will be placed upon human social, cognitive, and physical development. You will learn how social factors—such as one’s family, socioeconomic status, and culture—impact upon human development. You will also learn the current state of affairs in America for factors (e.g., divorce, child...

Dec 29th